I'm A Monster
by CopyKitten
Summary: Roxas views himself as a monster, and takes it out on Axel when really it's just a plea for help... AkuRoku (if that's how you want to read it as)


Angsty stuff huh? I guess so. I mean I ain't gonna upload a whole bunch of stories at once if all of them are happy sappy cute and fluffy aha! So just deal with a little bit of sadness. Roxas was my favourite character to vent as because I felt a little bit of kinship with him *sigh* nowadays it's Kankri or Eridan or Sollux from Homestuck and Reiko from Natsume Yuujinchou. Speaking of Natsume Yuujinchou I'm a sucker for Natori/Natsume and really wanna write them so yeah! That;s the factoid for this too! Relatable characters and new ships.

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Axel walked the dark room from which he had heard a crying noise come from. Roxas had been missing for the whole day and no one seemed to know where he was. Unsurprisingly he found his best friend crying in the corner of the room surrounded by pillows with his arms wrapped tightly around his legs.

"Rox? Are you okay?" Axel asked but Roxas didn't move.

"Roxas... Why are you crying?" Roxas still didn't reply though. Axel nudged the blonde 14 year old and he looked up into the green of Axel's eyes. When the red headed 17 year old saw his friend's face it was different from usual. Instead of the pale creamy skin, it was a red tear stained one. Instead of the pale pink lips he usually had, there was a pair of blood stained ones, from him having bitten them to suppress his sniffles. The one thing Axel hated about Roxas' face at the moment was instead of his ocean-like, calm, pretty blue eyes they were now like raging waters, angry sea-gods and a dark stormy sadness.

"Axel..." Roxas sobbed through the tears. "Help me... I've become a monster."

"You are not a monster! You're the kindest person ever!"

"No I'm not! I'm not... If I'm so perfect then why do I always feel so stupid?!" Axel looked at him confused, why would his friend say something like that?

"You don't get it do you? I'm an idiot. No one loves me, not even my own family. Did you know my parents wanted to send me to a home and disown me? No you probably don't, of course you wouldn't because I'm always: Oh Axel! Hi, I've had such a great day today, how about you?" Roxas did the same voice he always had whenever Axel had been with him. It was all a facade... "I have no friends other than you and your friends. I only get to see you and them every other week! I can't take it! I CAN'T TAKE BEING ALONE! Not again... Never again... I don't want to be alone ever again, even when I know you'll come back I just can't bare it... It's too much, I just wanna die or disappear or erase myself from the planet so no one can remember me and I can forget every feeling I've ever had just to be a peace... I need help but no one will help ME."

"Roxas, if you'd told me I would have helped!"

"No you wouldn't have! No one would have..." Roxas forgot the anger and went back to crying. His life was a complete utter mess… It was a shipwreck and he couldn't have things go back to how they were before. Maybe he was being a bit over dramatic. Maybe he was over reacting. Maybe he just was confused and was trying to calm himself down, but those were probably not the problems. He was reacting to his failure of a life in the most logical way possible, that he could think of. Axel went in for an awkward kind of hug being as supportive as possible. Roxas wrapped his arms around his friend, resting his face in the crook that joined his neck and shoulder. As Axel felt the tears of his best friend, the one who cared for the most in the world, he felt something stir deep inside of him. He hated seeing his best friend in the world so sad and there was a plausible reason behind it.

"Yes I would have because..." Axel realised then, why he became friends with Roxas in the first place. "I love you. I love you so much and if you love someone you never leave them." He became friends with Roxas because he was like a role model. He was beautiful, he was smart, he was so kind and he the way he stared into the sunset on the day the two of them first met was so happy. It was if Roxas was the embodiment of perfection. He looked as if he had not a care in the world that moment. That was 4 years ago and whenever Axel had seen the blonde he had maintained that look. That's why he loved him. He may not have realised it before but he actually did love his best friend.

"Wh-what?" Roxas stuttered not believing what he had just heard.

"I love you. I love you so much. I love you so much I won't ever let you go. Never ever ever. I help you through the hard times. I help you through the tough times. I help you whenever you need help and I'll never leave you. That I promise." Axel whispered into Roxas' ear as he hugged him tight.

"I... I love you too..." Roxas and Axel stayed like that for a few minutes before Roxas finally fell asleep in the red head's arm after hearing the last 'I love you' tumble from Axel's lips. He slept in peace finally knowing he had someone in the world to go to...


End file.
